James Allen
Presents
James Allen's
Bits And Pieces
Now, completely ignoring the obvious hilarity of the title, let's take a look at the rest of the cover. Does it fit all the criteria for an awesome book? Let's see.
Presents
James Allen's
Bits And Pieces
Now, completely ignoring the obvious hilarity of the title, let's take a look at the rest of the cover. Does it fit all the criteria for an awesome book? Let's see.Blood: Yes
Bones: Yes
Big Awesome Font: Yes
Chicks With Big Boobs: No
Explosions: No
Dinosaurs/Robots: No
Bones: Yes
Big Awesome Font: Yes
Chicks With Big Boobs: No
Explosions: No
Dinosaurs/Robots: No
So, the cover is 50% awesome. The book is half perfect and we haven't even opened it yet! That means the entire rest of the book only has to be 50% awesome to make it a classic. So, let's start with our first story.
Good Hunting starts like any good story should, with a guy with a big gun walking around in the jungle. It appears he hired some native guides to take him and his bitchin' mustache on a safari for some big game. Then, on day five...
Holy shit yes! Please tell me those are tracks of what I think they are...
Then all of a sudden!
SWEEEEET! I think we all see where this is heading.
Dinosplosion!
And then, later:
Minidinosplosion!
So, there's story one, and already we've reached 83.33% awesome, since exploding dinosaurs count as both dinosaurs and explosions. Really, we could stop here and just be happy with what we've got, but we're not going to. Because up next is...
Wait? Wasn't this the title of a story from the last James Allen book we reviewed? Yes, it is. In fact, it's the same story entirely, but with a few upgrades. Namely, everyone has huge genitals.
Hell, even Eva has a huge package. What kind of crazy growth hormones do they put in the food in underground bunkers?
Well, let's take another win for James Allen, having successfully created a 100% awesome book. Give the man a hand. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to write him a letter.
Good Hunting starts like any good story should, with a guy with a big gun walking around in the jungle. It appears he hired some native guides to take him and his bitchin' mustache on a safari for some big game. Then, on day five...
Holy shit yes! Please tell me those are tracks of what I think they are...Then all of a sudden!
SWEEEEET! I think we all see where this is heading.
Dinosplosion!And then, later:
Minidinosplosion!So, there's story one, and already we've reached 83.33% awesome, since exploding dinosaurs count as both dinosaurs and explosions. Really, we could stop here and just be happy with what we've got, but we're not going to. Because up next is...
Wait? Wasn't this the title of a story from the last James Allen book we reviewed? Yes, it is. In fact, it's the same story entirely, but with a few upgrades. Namely, everyone has huge genitals.
Hell, even Eva has a huge package. What kind of crazy growth hormones do they put in the food in underground bunkers?
Well, let's take another win for James Allen, having successfully created a 100% awesome book. Give the man a hand. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to write him a letter.
