2007-11-26

Daredevil Battles Hitler

Greetings Dear Readers,

I trust you all had a fun and eventful time with your family and friends this thanksgiving (unless you are a sad, friendless orphan, in which case I just made you feel terrible). Well, now that I've had an opportunity to recover from a long, turkey-induced coma, It's time for me to introduce you to what is quite possibly the greatest comic cover you'll ever see in your life.
Daredevil Battles Hitler #1

Now, this isn't the Daredevil most people associate with the name (he's the blue/red guy on ther , but really, he's basically the same character. Except instead of being a blind acrobat who beats people with sticks, he's a brightly-colored acrobat who throws boomerangs at Nazis. With me so far? Good. Now, let's take a look at the things that make this comic cover so great. I've taken the liberty of placing some handy labels.
Ok, so you can clearly see there are 4 points to this cover than make it so amazing.

#1 - Words are EXPLODING! Let's face it, on the list of things that are badass, explosions rank at least within the top five. (Just above a shark eating an alligator, but not quite as high as cyborg dinosaurs). Now normally when things explode in comics it's just stuff like cars, airplanes, buildings, and other things you'd expect. However, this comic is so badass that even the words, which are traditionally boring and not badass, are fucking blowing up everywhere! Trusted sources tell me that as soon as you open this comic, a real explosion goes off right in your face. Nobody who reads this comic ever survives.

Sweeeeeeet!

#2 - Giant Hitler. Ok, so we all know that Hitler is pretty much not cool. But, you have to admit, this guy was about as close to a real supervillain as we got during WW2, so to imagine the prospect of a Hitler that is 15 times the size of a normal Hitler, who is obviously about to pounce on your town is just fucking terrifying. However, this also goes to further illustrate how great of a hero Daredevil is. Giant Hitler is basically ready to just surrender to his awesomeness. It's obvious when looking at this cover that if we had really wanted to win World War 2, we should have just sent a clown to Germany to throw a boomerang at Hitler. Think about it, if Giant Hitler is scared of Daredevil, regular Hitler shits himself just knowing Daredevil is on the same planet!
#3 - Scary demon guy just standing there. I don't know what the fuck this guy is supposed to be, or why he's there in the first place, but he's obviously not really contributing to the fight. He's just sitting there staring at you. I think he serves as a warning for people about to buy the book.

Then we come to the fourth, and arguably greatest thing about this cover

#4 - A gun that shoots airplanes. I don't know how much more I need to say about this. It's a gun and it shoots out airplanes instead of bullets. Actually, it's more than just the gun. Let's zoom in on that whole situation.

Is that... oh my, I think it is. Is Archie battling Hitler? With a gun that shoots airplanes? I.... I just don't know what to say about how great that is.

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BONUS FEATURE: Cyborg Dinosaurs!